Purpose and advantage are developed by persevering through difficult times. Douglas MacArthur on V-J day said, "It is my earnest hope that from this solemn occasion a better world shall emerge." We often hear that Japan was defeated in war, but was victorious in peace. This does not justify the horror of the combat, but it illustrates the victory of courageous rebirth.
Alvin Toffler, the author of Future Shock, said that we are a nation suffering from over-choice. Adversity ordinarily limits these choices creating advantage from difficulty. Trouble concentrates the mind. Adversity sharpens the focus. Some of us are trying to get away from difficulties that propel us much like sailboats trying to navigate calm days without wind. The wind of adversity is our motivation. When one of our grown granddaughters was about three we took her on a trip. While riding to our room on the 15th floor she stretched without success to push the button. She looked at her grandmother and said, "I wish we were on the 2nd floor." When asked why, she straightforwardly answered, "It would be so much more comfortable." Tough times stretch us but often we wish that we could stay on the second floor. Growth, not comfort is the object of life's exercise.
Unexpected lessons in the value of loss came to an affluent family when in time of loss they had to deny their children the customary financial opportunities. After the parents discussed the family situation, the children became understanding and participated in the time of trouble. That financial loss may become a great blessing to those children. As someone observed, "after being put on our back, we find it easier to look up." The loss of choice may have been an open window to temporarily escape the rat race that many young families experience.
Having found the purpose and value of persevering through trouble 1) we can pass it on to others; 2) we learn to help others; and 3) we determine to be an example for others. Our thinking about stewardship comes into clearer focus. We often think of the times that we didn't share when we had the resources. Difficult times can be distilling. They provide a platform for reflection and reprioritization.
In order to learn from the experience of trouble as we go along it is good to write down what is happening and what can be learned from it. A young friend of mine in the real estate business kept a journal during a time when he lost a considerable fortune. It was important that he do it during the process for it showed him the value of what he was experiencing. I always recommend that we look for the good of a bad experience. Then, more importantly, never lose the good in a bad experience. The second reason for writing during the trials is that the immediacy of the experience is irreplaceable. If we wait until we have traveled through the valley we will lose much of the impact that "in the midst of" brings. Think of a time that was a growth period. Remember how vivid it was while you were in it? Is it hard to recreate all the lessons that you learned? Write them down as you go and then apply them.
It is a truism that winners never give up on themselves nor on others. Prior to a Super Bowl one of the players was being interviewed and was asked the "what are you going to do when you win?" question. He said, "As soon as I get my Super Bowl ring I'm going to drop down on my knees and thank God for my dead mother. She kept me in when I wanted to quit. She never gave up on me. " I bet there will be someone in his life that he won't give up on.
