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Dear Fred
Fred, Thanks for the wisdom you so aptly share on your web site. I learned of you from Steve Brown's ministry. He has been a great help to me through his broadcasts and through an occasional email. He has also advised me once or twice on the subject I am about to put to you, though not on this particular issue. (So I am not using you for "comparison sake!") I'll try to be brief. I have been an Assoc. Pastor at a church for 22 years now. 16 months ago my Sr. Pastor, mentor, and long time friend fell morally. He was arrested in an undercover sting for solicitation of prostitution. I have done all I can in these months to help hold our very wounded church together. I assumed the role of "Interim Teaching Pastor." After 14 months a "Pastor Selection Committee" was formed. At 15 months they asked to meet with me and told me they did not feel led to consider me as a candidate for Sr. Pastor. The rationale was that a complete change was needed. (i.e. When the Sr. Pastor blew up he splattered all over me.) I can deal with that. I said that was fine and that I would continue to serve in whatever capacity the church desired. The committee made that report to the church and the church came unglued. They directed the committee, by a strong majority vote, to present me. I began to decline and was implored by many church leaders to allow the vote to proceed because it was necessary for the church to deal with me before they could move on. The vote came and was 56% "yes" and 44% "no." 75% was required so the vote clearly failed. This, obviously leaves me rather impotent in leadership at this church. I have continued on in the 3 weeks since the vote. I have several reasons. A) If I leave immediately there may well be a major departure of those who feel I was treated improperly. I'd rather not be the battle ground for a church split. B) If I leave immediately there are several serious ministry situations (critical illnesses, etc.) that will not be addressed. C) In order to maintain the integrity of the body I am clearly on record as stating that the vote should not be a "test of fellowship." In other words, if I was not elected I would not "take my little red wagon and go home and the membership should not either." I am trying to honor that. I have bled with these people for 16 months. I realize that when I allowed my name to go to a vote I chose the hill that I would die on. And I did, indeed, die on it. The selection committee declined to schedule prayer and/or fasting times before the vote on me. They scheduled the vote to be held in 2 weeks from the time they were directed to present me. And they scheduled it on the evening of Super Bowl Sunday. Ouch. You can imagine how that felt. Now that the vote on me has failed they are organizing the church into prayer & fasting teams for whomever they do feel led to present in the future. I suppose you can imagine what that does to ones heart. So here is the question. My mother passed away in September. My share of the inheritence was rougly $100,000. That is my annual salary times two. So, if necessary, I can live two years without a paycheck. I do have resume's circulating and I know that when God opens a door I am to go through it ... assuming it is clearly His leading. BUT ... at what point is is appropriate to leave without having another job to go to? I don't really desire to spend money that can be used toward retirement for daily living expenses. If God does not open a door to another ministry does that mean I should stay put? Would God direct me to leave without telling me where to go? The church is not chasing me off or asking me to leave. But yes, we (my wife, two sons, and I) are a bit wounded and weary. Ok, very wounded and weary. At what point have I fulfilled my obligations? I am not hearing God very clearly these days. I believe the battle has cauterized my "spiritual ears." I have said that I would leave the church in one of 3 ways. When God tells me to. When the church tells me to. Or in a box. I do not want to violate God's standards, Fred. But ... how long can you bleed before having to fold up shop? Obviously there are great details omitted from my story, Fred. You don't have enough time to read the entire thing and I do not have the time to write it out. But you have the main points. Please do not answer this on the web site. I would be very grateful for your thoughts by private email. I am quite certain others from my church read your web site because I have recommended it often. I do not wish to hurt them in any way and reading my question just might do that. Thanks for all you do in Kingdom work, my friend. Ron
Fred's Response
Answer Coming Soon
