Ask Fred > Ethics > How do I take a Christian stand for morality?
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Dear Fred
I'm currently in a committed long distance relationship with a man who I like. The problem is we always have misunderstandings and we broke up several times because of these. We made up again. One of our disagreements is the fact that he wanted me to live with him without first getting married. He said we need to see first whether or not we can get along before we can get married. I believe that we can but he's not convinced. I believe that if 2 person really work on a relationship, it can work, no matter what. He thinks I'm very needy and he's afraid he cannot meet my needs without him getting crazy. He believes that we need a "trial run" first. What do you think I should do? I want to be with him but my morals won't allow it.
Fred's Response
Once a man who had left his wife and two daughters for a “bimbo†as he called her, came to a layman’s retreat and wanted to talk with me. He told me his story and as I heard I turned it around and said to him, “Let me tell you your story back to you as if it were happening to me and you give me your best advice.†When I retold him his story as if it were mine he immediately said, “Give her up ---- she’s bad news.†Yet, he said, “I can’t give her up because she makes me feel so young.†If one of your good friends were to tell you she was in your situation I imagine you would tell her, “run because you are on a slippery slope without a good ending.†Congratulations on maintaining your moral standard.
