Daily Fenelon > Wrong Motivation
Wrong Motivation
There is something deceptively wrong with the way you deal with your suffering. While on the outside you seem to be only concerned with the glory of God, the unconquered self-nature deep within is causing you trouble. I am sure that you want God to be glorified, but you want His glory to be expressed through the testimony that He has made you perfect. Let me tell you that this feeds self-love. It is simply a clever disguise of the self-nature.
If you really want to grow from the discovery of your faults, do not justify nor condemn yourself because of them. Instead, quietly bring them before God. Agree with Him about all things— even those you cannot understand.
Remain at peace, for peace is what God wants for you no matter what is happening. There is, in fact, a peace of conscience which sinners should enjoy as they are repenting. Suffering should be peaceful and tempered with God's comfort. Remember the wonderful word of God that once delighted you—the Lord was not in noise and confusion, but in the still, small voice, (I Kings 19:11)